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September 11, 001, changed the way I look at life.

I awoke to the disruptive blare of the alarm clock that signaled the start of another monotonous morning schedule. Under the dim glow of shining stars and with traffic lights as my guide, I headed down to the church for a droning class of scripture study. Life was good; I felt invincible.

My mother drove into the parking lot to pick me up as usual in her white Explorer--she appeared neither rushed nor alarmed. Her demeanor revealed nothing to indicate the devastation of the news she delivered. Her exclamation, "It's the start of World War III," rocked my body. I could not register her words as she explained what had happened. I tried to picture the two buildings, symbols of capitalism, colliding planes, and fireballs,a vision of Armageddon. I thought about Hollywood's version--"Independence Day"--but this was the real thing, no creation from tinsel town. I tried to absorb the prattle of radio reports and at the same time grasp my mom's babble as we drove home.

This day would be devoted to understanding what had happened to make my mom think that a world war would be started based on what had occurred earlier in the morning. Was it really the beginning of the end?

I immediately turned on the television; it would remain on for the rest of the day. The image of two towers, like two giant tombstones, one burning from the impact, one intact, assaulted my vision, creating a permanent imprint. Minutes later a plane struck the second tower, creating a massive scar in its side. It occurred to me that what happened might have been a coordinated effort. Was someone from another country behind this, or were there citizens of the United States willing to kill thousands of people to prove a point?

Information from the radio both enlightened and confused me as I negotiated the familiar turns on my way to Bullard. News that the first tower had fallen, sending out a cloud of dust like a volcano, greeted me as I arrived at my first period class. How many people just died? When had we ever been attacked on our homeland? History had taught me about the infamy of December 7, 141. Was Pearl Harbor to World War II as the towers were to World War III? I had many more questions than answers.

Students huddled in groups to hear the news for the first time or to grasp "old" information. The expressions on their faces, like masks from a Greek tragedy, matched the way I felt. Televisions provided images and background noise to all irrelevant activities. The teacher attempted to divert our attention by starting a lesson plan. There was no hope. Eyes were glued to the "box." Eventually the teacher stopped trying to teach and was likewise snared by the television's web of shock and terror. Any bit of news proved all-absorbing.

Information from the media would continue to bombard and muddle my mind for days and weeks to come. What might come next was impossible to predict. Safety and security vanished with the onslaught of each new revelation of horror. My thoughts had a new edge. September 11 had sharpened my senses, heightened my defense and increased my apprehension. The future lay before me like a bad dream and I knew that life as I knew it had evaporated.

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